Another year ends tonight, and like every year it was one filled with its shares of ups and downs. It had its milestones and it had its pitfalls but all in all, it was not short from being a learning experience for me.
Usually as is the case with every year, great people enter our lives and others just disappear, but for me the issue of disappearing and reappearing friends took an unexpected twist like no other this year.
You see, this time last year, I remember talking about my anticipation for a good long term friendship, only to have that friendship silenced (not sure if it is ended even) with no explanations, or even reasons exactly a year later. The news of such an outcome saddens me but in it I learn., I even grew to believe that not everyone owes us explanations for changing or leaving, and not all friendships are meant to be long term, in my case only time will tell how long term this silenced friendship is.
Regardless of the outcome, I also realized that we can only wish those people who disappear on us well, and we can let the whole issue go while sincerely hoping that these people find all the happiness they seek in life. We can only try to mend a broken friendship or initiate communication, but we can’t force the other side involved to talk to us if they choose not to.
This is not to say that the hoodinis in our lives are bad, maybe they have their reasons and these are the reasons that are related to them alone.
From another angle, I made new friends and I also learned who my real friends are. If anything the friendship issue makes me leave 2013 with my own definition of long term friends and to me our long term friends are those we can disagree with while knowing that they can forgive us and accept us as being far from perfect.
In other areas, 2013 was not a bad year, far from it. Its highlights for me included launching my own online magazine “Hathrabeh Lounge” with my two good friends, which is something I am proud of since it represents a dream turned reality. I also saw Dubai for the first time this year.
In Dubai, I was not too impressed with its sky scrapers, malls, and high-speed or high-tech lifestyle, it was an item I crossed off my Bucket list. I also learned new things on the job , and I translated my first book from Arabic to English, and to me these are all my milestones for 2013.
This year was also a year of continuation, as I continued working on my voluntary project for English Teaching in Gaza Camp, and I also continued moving forward in Toastmasters. I became a president of a club which was in bad shape, and I was able to contribute to turning that around. However, I leave this year not sure of my levels of interest or commitment to these pursuits. I really hope 2014 will be a time for me to renew my passions for these causes, as I’m losing such passions and I fear not caring.
2013 was also a year of personal challenges, I challenged myself to lose weight which I did, and I challenged myself to read 12 new books which I did. I challenged myself to gossip less which I did, and I challenged myself to lose my temper less, which I’m working on, as I am still too fiery inside .
Finally, 2013 also had its areas of neglect, and one area of neglect for me was my blog Faces, which in 2014 I insisted on revitalizing.
All in all, to me the last day of any year presents a time for us all to set lofty resolutions, and in our natural tendency to be positive we leave every year with the firm belief that we can make anything happen. However, I also see the danger in doing so, as we can also find ourselves disappointed in the last day of the year when we realize that we just lived, and we just continued with our lives or that our list of resolutions is just as long as it was 12 months before.
To avoid this outcome this year, my only resolution for 2014 is to do my best and to be the best person I can be. To do that, I will continue to learn about myself.
You see, a new year doesn’t make us any wiser, but it does make us feel like we get a second chance. So let’s believe that for now and let us really make 2014 count.
At the end of the day, I don’t think we need to set resolutions; instead we need to make true evolutions in ourselves, we just need to evolve past those issues we can’t resolve and we will be fine and the world will be fine. So enough with the philosophy, I just hope that this time next year, we will all have enough to be happy about.
Happy New Year to you all.